Happy Holidays~~~Not...

To all my Hindu and Muslim readers (yes, ONLY my blog readers...muahaha), Happy Deepavali and Selamat Hari Raya! Drive carefully when you balik kampung or else you'll end up being a sandwich...or at least you'll look like a white swiss roll wrapped up in white cloth. Ah, what nonsense...While I keep you all busy with my blog, I'll go smoke some Marijuana...*puff*...*cough cough*...

Doom *Spoiler*

**Read at your own risk**

As I entered the cinema, I rushed to my seat with anticipation, hoping that I would get a good view of the movie. What luck...I was sitting behind a couple who were doing what couples usually do. And the guy was friggin blocking my view! Damn, I just wished that I had a shotgun at that moment to blast his head off! But as a gentleman...I gave face to his pretty lil girlfriend...who doesn't know the meaning of "public distraction".

The movie started off with a brief introduction of how it all began (those UAC on Mars and all the portal bullcrap with demons). Right after the intro, what had truly made me laugh out loudly was the Malay subs displaying "Kemusnahan" which means "Doom".

OK, let's just skip to the casts (or rather the victims) of the show, mainly the The Rapid Response Tactical Squad (RRTS). Below are the details of each members and their characteristics and their fate...




Code Name: Mac
Based on his looks, one could simply tell that this guy is rather an Asian than an American. Therefore, he is destined to die in this show. Easy prediction.




Code Name: Portman
A sinister soldier, he is. He doesn't take things seriously and he's too sinister for a movie like Doom. Most probably he'll die...and my prediction came true...




Code Name: The Kid
Let's just say this boy is a noobie in the whole RRTS group. With the current situation in Mars, this is no place for noobies. I thought he would at least survive...yeah...in a way...but he was shot dead by Sarge. What a wasted sperm...Tsk tsk tsk...



Code Name: Samantha aka Sam
Ah, every horror movie will have at least a beauty in it...Well, as you've guessed it, she will somehow survive throughout the whole horror thingy, regardless of where it's located; Raccoon City or Mars, the main actress will always survive.




Code Name: Goat
Goat...not a very suitable name for someone who's about to breach the UAC. Anyway, tough guy, always looking and acting cool. I like this guy...but unfortunately...luck wasn't on his side...



Code Name: Reaper
Handsome guys are always a plus in a movie. Why? Think about it, what's a horror movie without a handsome guy? Aww come on, audiences need to be drawn to something other than zombies and monsters (who are hideous-looking) right? That explains why he lives.



Code Name: Duke
First impression, this guy's not white...my guess is that he would have a 60% chance of survival. But come to think about it, guys who are given the task to protect main actresses are more prone to die violently...



Code Name: Destroyer
Wow...another bad-ass-kickin' guy, who wields a chaingun at his disposal. But wait...did I mention that non-whites are more prone to die?




Code Name: Sarge
The Rock...First impression, this guy's gonna make it through the movie cause he's a hollywood star. Moments later, I got to know that he plays the role of "The Sarge", who is a villain in the video game. And villains do not have happy endings...

Uncle G

Ever since Siva (lecturer) left APIIT, nobody has been going through Malaysian Studies (codename: MS) with us. We have completely neglected MS as there were no replacement lecturers for that class. And this is the story of what actually happened today...

Uncle G...that's the title we gave to our newbie MS lecturer. Why? Well, it's basically because he looks like a Wise person (although he looks darn old with his young-at-heart attitude). And as you have noticed (or haven't yet), "G" stands for Grandpa. LOL

Before the class, rumours were passed around saying that this fellow lecturer was still in APIIT TPM.

What we thought: No class again...*sigh*
What had happened: I was sleeping in the syndicate room when my mates woke me up saying that the lecturer arrived.

They claimed that I will LIKE the newbie lecturer for who he is. I took my bag and walked straight to class...only to find out that an elderly old folk is taking his sweet time staring at the pc monitor.

I sat in front of the lecturer's table. Guess that was the biggest mistake I'd made. I'll get to that later. Everyone returned to their seats and there was silence. Guess who broke the silence...and it was a bad start...

"Which is the icon to access the web attendance?"


As I was sitting in front...I was truly tragically shocked by what he had mentioned! It was the dumbest thing I ever heard from APIIT!

We told him to click on the Internet Explorer icon...

"Which one?"
"There, the one below your mouse pointer"
"Where? You mean this 'e' shaped icon?"
"Ya..."
"Are you sure?"
"DUH!!!"


These are the rest of the questions he asked us...
"Ok, now I've clicked it, now how do I get into the site?"
"Which button do I click then?"


I felt pain in my a** everytime he asked those questions...even a parrot is smarter than him...at least the parrot is better in learning...After marking down our attendance into the APIIT website, he asked us if we knew what our intake code stands for. Like we even bother! Go ahead and teach, folk! We're left so far behind and we don't have time for NONSENSE!

As he preached about the intake codes......he took one our fren's MS textbook and asked, "Eh, what book is this?" For God's sake, READ THE DAMN TITLE!!! It states "MALAYSIAN STUDIES"!!


Okay, fine...now he really got into my nerves...what next? He asked Kugan to read out the MS textbook's copyrights! Great! What a waste of time! Thank YOU so much! Great job! And guess what? He spotted two innocent girls who had a photocopy of the whole book. His expression? Like this:


He recommends teaching us MS not through the text book...but online! WTF??!! Being the handsome guy who chose to sit in front of his table is a helluva darn mistake!!! As he browsed through the net, every single page couldn't be displayed! That's an act of wasting precious time when you can teach us directly from the text book!

Lecturer: "Ok, now I'm going to introduce myself. I am *writes name on whiteboard* Mr. Warren. There are two reasons why you all should remember my name. The first reason is not as important as the second reason. Can anyone give me the reason why?"

Student: "So that we know who taught us...?"

Lecturer: "Yes, that is correct! So that you know who tortured you all. Now what's the second reason?"

Me: *whisper to friend* "Wah diu...he will definitely say 'the second reason is more important than the first'. Heh, don't believe?"

Lecturer: "The second reason is more important than the first. Can you guess it?"



I couldn't guess the reason, but I guessed your sentence! So predictable...

Lecturer: Okay, the second reason is, don't ever call me 'Sir' because I don't have any qualifications as a Professor or Doctor or what-so-ever. Just call me by my name.

Like hell I care about your background...just TEACH, old man!!!

The class continued miraculously while having him telling us lots of crap that wasn't relevant to the subject...you know...bedtime stories of some sort, just that it has got to do with Malaysia/Malaya.

Break time came. After I went to toilet and came back, he seemed to be staring at the monitor screen for around 5 minutes showing "Page cannot be displayed". Now that's what I call a noob...really...

Part Time Job As a T.A.

Status: Probation
Duration: 7th Oct - 30 Nov 2005
Mentor: Ang Wey Loong
Mistakes: 2 (not gonna disclose it)
Successful Tasks: Quality Check and Test-Printing
Salary: RM?
Number of hours worked so far: 5

Note:
Duty is still a duty...no more Mr. Nice guy...must learn to be serious and if you find me LCLY, too bad-lah...I had learned my mistakes...embarrassed like $#!T...

The Twisted Meaning of Godbrother/sister

Boy: I have been waiting all these while to say this, and now is the perfect time.

Girl: Yes...? What is it..? *blush blush*

Boy: Will you be my girlfriend? *with a charming sohai smile*

Girl: Erm...although we have been together for a long time, I still think that I'm not prepared yet, I hope you'd understand.

*Romantic song played by a violin stops*

Boy: Why? Aren't we close enough? Alright...I'll follow what your heart tells you. But can I be your "kor kor" instead? I'll promise to take care of you *smiles like a sohai*

Girl: Why not? It sounds fine to me!

Boy: Jie Jie...

Girl: Kor Kor...

*Violin playing a romantic song again, both of them started holding hands*

*The End*

From the case study above, the term "kor kor" and "jie jie" doesn't differ much from the "girlfriend/boyfriend" term, right? Just to make it sound right (or maybe more precise), it is just a less formal way of claiming that you're someone's boy/girlfriend.

In another words...it can also be classified as the term used to show that the boy has
FAILED TO TACKLE THE GIRL AND HE'S USING THIS LAME TERM TO COVER UP HIS DIGNITY.

Period.