Tips and Myths About Zombies

Zombies (often humanoid) are derived from those who are brought back to life but are unconscious of their behaviour. Back in those days when zombies are first introduced, they were slow and stupid, and have fetish for braaaaiiiinnnnzzz. Would you like to know more?

Zombies attack in hordes. There will be one zombie at first during the start of the outbreak, but do not, I repeat...DO NOT underestimate him/her/it! The zombie, if safety measures are not taken, will attack another individual and infect him, spreading the virus and if this is not under control, it will create a disaster no human could possibly imagine!

Myth #1: Zombie fluid are infectious and they must not enter another individual's blood stream.

Myth #2: The duration of the zombification process varies between individuals, depending on the blood type and immunity system.

Like I had mentioned, zombies are slow and stupid, so why bother? THIS is EXACTLY the kind of ignorance I'm talking about! How do you know that they cant RUN?! Modern zombies apparently have learnt the ability to rush. They know how to climb, run, clobber down doors, jump through windows and many more than you could possibly imagine. Zombies these days scare the crap out of me.

Myth #3: Zombies are attracted to high contrast light.

Myth #4: Zombies apparently become stunned in place when rock music is played.

Whether fast or slow zombies, they have a common weakness which is their brain! Dismembering or disembowelling them will not keep them down. In fact, their blood will splash around giving them a higher chance of infecting you as well.

Tip #1: Quickly reach for a weapon (anything that can be used to get to their brains) and start aiming for the head!

Important note: Beheading them will not end their misery because their brain is still whole.

Tip #2: Lighting a zombie on fire works too as long as they don't get too near you ala kamikaze.

If your partner or a friend is bitten by a zombie, quickly make decisions to isolate him or yourself from him. If he decides to stay behind to fight the horde, give him a melee weapon or a bomb preferably for him to take out as many as he can before he becomes one of them. DO NOT be a dumbf*ck and give him a gun when you need it more than him!

Tip #3: When encountered, RUN LIKE HELL!!!

Myth #5: Zombies are sensitive to quick movements and high pitch noises. Stay calm and move (and act) like a zombie to the exit as a last resort. Avoid wearing digital watches that make beeping sound hourly.

Heed these advices as one day (touch wood) a zombie outbreak may occur when you least expect it. A sign of a zombie outbreak is when you find that your parents are not at home, and the whole street is empty, cars parked in the middle of the road, house gates opened wide, blood smeared across windows, and crows flocking on street lamps and tension wires.

Be prepared, always remember these tips and choose your weapons and friends wisely...

My Failed Attempt On a Girl

Back when I was studying during my secondary school days, I didn't know shit about love. I know nothing about courting girls, heck I don't even have the charm like most of the other guys had in school. I was not as handsome as them, not as charismatic as them, and believe it or not, I actually had trouble mixing around with girls. And somehow I got into a relationship which didn't last too long nor genuine enough to make me realise how sucky I was as a partner. True enough, I didn't feel emotional at all after the break up (some say I have no feelings/heartless/cruel).

But then there was this girl whom I have not noticed since primary school. Didn't pay much attention to her during primary, but slowly got to know her more during my pre-relationship. She was sort of related to the whole thing...and yet I was too naive to realise what was more important.

How could I ever forgive myself for feeding the food she gave me to a stray cat. Sigh, those were the times when I was not aware of people's feelings, how it'd hurt her. Speaking of which, there was a time when she once decided to open up to me on the phone, telling me her personal issues. And what was I doing at that time? You guessed it, playing game...It was really rude, yes I know...

Fast forwarding to the college days. I remembered not attending for her birthday because I had to sit for my driving exam. I figured it was OK because I was not as important to her as her bf at that time. I was wrong...Now I realise that friends are equally as important as your life partner.

As time passed after her break-up, I often called to show that I care (yeah, I know it's kinda cheesy this way). I called with the excuse of calling for fun and guess what, the line was either silent or it ended pretty quickly. Most of the time she won't even pick up my call. I knew I was a total nuisance to be wanting to chat with her all the time, but I kept doing it regardless.

Another year passed and her birthday approached near. I took her out alone to the big city to catch a movie of her choice. If only I was a better planner, I could have made it a day she will not forget. The very evening, we got lost in the city on our way home. And then I realised if I cared a lot for her, I would have practised and familiarise myself with the roads in the city. 

On our way home, I remembered when I asked how she felt when I called her on the phone and the reason sometimes she didn't pick up my call. She said I was annoying and that sometimes it wasn't the right moment. I understood what she said and no hard feelings. By the end of the journey, how bad could it have ended when I totally screwed the proposal.

Since then, I have been living full of regrets. Why did I do this, why did I do that etc etc etc...Then came the moment when we are supposed to develope a flash application. I instantly thought of her and dedicatedly made it for her, hoping that she will like it. I sent it through email, asking her to reply if she like it, but no reply whatsoever till recently. I guess it wasn't good enough.

These events and many more took place in our lives. I was really a douche back then, and I don't blame her for labelling me "annoying". All I could hope for now is that she would give me a chance to start again, hopefully not too late.

What "Take Care" Means

You often see the word "take care" in greeting cards, emails and sometimes often heard when people finish a conversation between each other. Usually this "take care" is coupled with wishes like "good/best of luck". When I was still naive, I didn't pay attention to what it really means although it states the obvious. It's just that I'm too ignorant to bother the message.

That is until around a year ago when I started to get sick frequently. At first it was once every 2 months. Then as time passed by, it gradually became as frequent as once every month! I was not aware that the reason for the drop of my body's immunity system was the lifestyle I've adapted for a long time.

Allow me to share my opinions and advice with you readers so that you don't follow my footsteps, cause it is bad...mmkay?

1. Do not sleep later than 12am. They say that the "fire" will come after 12am.
2. Take bath frequently, at least twice a day with cold water. This is for those who have inner "flames" like me. Your parents don't have it, doesn't mean you don't have it.
3. Do some exercise/sports activities. At least you move your muscle and not grow roots. Exercising also helps the cardiovascular system improve.
4. Do not isolate yourself in a stuffy room. Try to ventilate it with fresh air as best as you can.
5. Do not always eat heaty food. For me, my throat is sensitive to spicy, heaty things. Drinking plenty of water is a must!
6. Do not take bath late at night. Don't know true or not, but they say that when you are older, you will often get headaches/body aches.
7. Control your diet
   ; Take too much of sweet stuff and you'll get diabetes/sugar rocks in kidney.
   ; Take too much chocolate and your pimples will pop out (for my case la).
   ; Take too much fats and you'll get heart failure (or is it?).

Can't think of anymore. You just have to be aware of what you consume, and how you manage your lifestyle. Hopefully I won't get sick as often as before...and now I really mean it when I say "take care" because it is very very difficult when you're weak. I've suffered enough, emotionally, physically and monetarily. 

Free-Thinker No More

Do you guys know what it takes to be a christian? Nah, I couldn't be bothered if you ask me. I am who I am and will live my life as free as a bird, doing what I want and what I like. That is until now that the bird is being held in someone's hands telling the bird not to fly away. Let me put it simply this way...

The queen of the house asked me to get baptized (a ritual to officially convert me into a christian) at a church my parents usually attend. She said that my father will be getting baptized soon and therefore her son must follow suit. She said afterall when the whole family are christians, they will get a chance to set up a christmas tree, celebrate christmas together etc etc.

If so, WHAT THE HECK have we been doing for these past 21 years?? What cards did we post to friends? What celebration did we hold on every 25th of Dec?? Who have we been praying to?? She must be crazy to think that a full christian can do what non-christians cant. But I kept it all inside, not wanting to blurt out those words to her. Later she scold me again (sort of like our government...say a bit only, ISA come).

Ok, cut the crap. She asked me to get baptized and she passed me the form. I looked at it. I read out loud, "Please sign me up for baptism....AND membership class for those not baptized and seeking membership. What if I want to get baptized and NOT be a member?".

She said the membership class is only for 1-2 hours. I was thinking "If this class is for every week, I'm gonna ponteng kowkow...whoever make noise about it, I'm gonna shoot back". So I went and filled up the form...

(click to enlarge)

Heh, my mother asked why I didn't fill up the 2nd row, where I'm required to provide my name. I said "Like they are gonna call my chinese name...and I dont think they will ever call my name AFTER baptism because I wont attend ANY classes they hold whatsoever...".

I also did not provide my hp number for the same reason...wahahha! Oh man...I will be snoozing while my father listens to the lecture during the 1-2 hours of baptism class on the 25th Dec. Haha...

Confession

Last week was just like any other ordinary week, but all that changed until the weekend approached when plans were made to go on holiday with my fellow coursemates. Complications arose between them and I, and in the end I had decided not to join them as I was the "outstanding" individual.

Whatever the reason was that caused those complications, I hereby state all my confessions to ease my mind (However, I do not wish forgiveness or sympathy from a certain sucker who doesn't know the meaning of "respecting people's rights"). Let's start according to alphabetical order.

KY - Why are you first in the list? (-_-)" Nothing to apologize for. Next!

PL - Sorry to bother you everytime with a miscall. Next time when I top up, I will send an SMS instead.

SF - Erm, sorry for blocking you? HA-HA...get that virus fixed and I'll unblock you.

SM - Sorry for having you as the middle man for all discussions. They probably thought I was not going afterall, but you invited me nevertheless. Sorry for letting you down by not going.

SW - Erm, sorry for blocking you? HA-HA

WH - Sorry for troubling you to come fetch me, although in the end I figured it'd be better if you dont, since another problem appeared "conveniently".

YF - Sorry about last week when I pretended like I wanna ffk you. I should have constructed my sentences properly cause what I meant was that my car cannot travel great distances, therefore I have to depend on people's transportation. Not that I intentionally want to ruin the plan.

ZQ - Sorry for troubling you to arrange transportation for me (although you're not driving at all). I thought you were really concerned about WH when you talked about his petrol and stuff when actually you were angry about your own damn time wasted planning for me. Give you a tip, next time when you plan, dont plan alone. Let others speak up and listen to them.