What Is Love?

What is love? How do you define love? When does love happen? How do you show love? How do you know if love is in the air? All these questions make me wonder, do girls (and guys) really truly understand what love is all about, and not just some kind of cheap crush or puppy love?

I have been thinking for the past few days and came up with several definitions that would define love based on past experience (not that i have had that many relationships before...just...experiences lah~)

Is love:

1) About the level of appearances of both parties?

E.g: A girl notices a handsome guy and she goes up to him. The guy, who believes in love at 1st sight, also finds her to be pretty and starts a relationship soon after. Everything else will matter later during their relationship.

2) About mutual understanding between two parties?

By having the same family background/situation, they two parties understand how the other person feels because s/he had experienced it before, and therefore being able to provide solutions, feedback, and consultation. The chemistry works somewhere in between the process and voila, you have "love"!...or is it?

3) Of similar interests?

Having the same sense of humour/movie and music taste/outdoor activities. I would like to refer this as being compatible with each other as it makes it very easy to get along with each other. But does it mean anything more than just "best friends"?

4) Caring for one another?

When one person notices even the slightest of difference in that special someone, could that lead to love? Of course, it must be a 2-way flow because that shows that the 2 of them are actually concerned for one another, thus noticing the differences and/or change of behaviour patterns. Some might say that it is a common thing to care for another as friends, but such minor details such as a change of diet (for example) over the past week/month might be enough to make one realize (because he is always watching her...). How about giving encouragement when the other person is experiencing low self-esteem?

5) Restricted to the financial status of another?

Does love linger around those with the same financial status? Can there be love between the poor and the rich, or somewhere in the middle? Does ego play a role here, or do women only look for rich men to support them in future? What happens if the men is unable to support, can there still be love?

6) One who can bring happiness to another?

Some women prefer men who can provide them with happiness. Happiness in the sense that actions and verbal communications that could provide laughter. Afterall, a happy couple is a healthy couple, right? However, I have experienced making others laugh, but I dont see the connection between us. So, could it be a factor?

7) Developed from a couple who always quarrel?

I have only seen this happen in dramas. Dont know if it could really happen in reality. Please let me know if you experienced such events before as i am interested to know more about it.

No Need Title lah...

Suitable song to be played now: Your Love Is A Lie - Simple Plan

Imagine a contractor who has already completed building 99% of a skyscraper in the middle of a busy city. Assuming the weather is calm, the plan goes well, and the hired labourers are all paid well with high motivation. All of a sudden, a meteor comes plummeting from the sky straight into the center of the building under construction. The building collapses, crashing down on the streets below, creating a domino effect on other nearby buildings. Thick dust rise up to form heavy clouds and fill the city with polluted air. Yala, i know most of you watched 2012 already...but that's just a movie. My feelings are real leh, words can only describe so much. *Sigh* Actually I felt this on Friday the 13th (last week) but now only posting it because I needed some cooldown time over the weekend.

People say that "there are many fish in the sea~". I say f*** you, all the nice fish let fisherman catch jor! I use fishing rod and bait to catch 1 fish, the fisherman use big net to catch MANY FISH. Diu...where got fish left for me leh~ I use what quality fishing rod or bait also no use already la! And there was an instance when I actually almost caught a fish, and then I looked closely at its fin. #%^#*! got the #%#%* tag on it! Malang betul, have to throw the fish back to where it belongs.

No Need Title lah...

Ok, so from now onwards, I'm gonna be keeping all the feelings to myself, the unhappy ones that is. I must train myself not to explode in front of the public. It is for the better, as my first impression is much more important. I will not act like there was something wrong, as if hiding behind an angel's mask. IMHO, letting others realise their mistakes have more effect than showing them their mistakes. Yup, if they do realise, i guess it shall be their burden to handle the guilt. I dont know why, but the devil within is always forcing me to return to the usual emo side of me. Is that what I really am? Am I better off that way, or do i continue putting on this angel's mask and pretend to be a nice guy? They say that bad guys get the best chicks. Hmm...I guess I'll play Mr Nice Guy for a while more just to see how things turn out (and also to keep my working image).

Eric, they always say "grasp the bird too tightly in your hands will only suffocate it. sometimes you have to learn to let go in order for the bird to come back into your hands". Well, I have been trying to let go, but why isn't it coming back? Am I missing something? If you know, please...guide me...already so lonely...somemore wanna let go...I've got nothing else left behind...lonely...

You know one thing I enjoy doing? Singing out loud karaoke style to the tunes of my mp3 player at home. Cant get any better stress reliever than that. It cleanses the mind and the soul. Sometimes I would just sing out aloud in my car while driving, you know, winding down the windows, turning up the volume, and just do the headbanging motion and tapping my fingers on the steering wheel. Cant do that when a passenger is with me though (shy mah).

When I die one day (come on, let's be realistic), during my funeral, I want this song to be played: "Be in the Mirror". Such a sad song can only be felt by those who experienced pain and suffering. Not that I suffered a lot in my life, I just feel that it might be the most suitable song to convey the mood. Makes it more touching and has the "you shall be missed" feeling, haha...

No Need Title lah...

What is life without facebook? If you have read through the star article few weeks ago, 3 students volunteered to take part in the activity where they are not allowed to access any social networking websites. Since they are hardcore, they would always log on to these sites just to see what's going on around their friends. Also not forgetting the posts they make to get attention from viewers. For me, social networking sites are considerably helpful where birthdates are concerned (cant remember all our friends' birthdates mah), but other than that, it should not be the primary location to express. Why am I writing this then? Simple. Not many people know my blog =D Furthermore, Im only writing this so that i can view it back at another date to remind myself of how noob I was before I change (hopefully will change for the better la ha..). And if you're reading this, good for you because:
a) either you went all the way and research about me or
b) I trust you enough to give you this url

But anyway, back to topic. Social networking websites can never be on par with meeting people in person. With that said, I would strongly suggest that "to know one person more, you must meet the person face to face and not through chatting online via social networking applications. It just takes away the mood and feel. Facial expressions/body language could not be seen and heard (dont even mention emoticons).

No Need Title lah...

You also should not expect a lot aka dont "perasan". Whatever intention that is done for/to you, is not exactly what you think it is. It might be something unique/special/extraordinary to you, but for the other person, it might just be a normal casual thing which doesn't mean anything. Expecting a lot would only lead to one thing: Disappointment. From there, bad stress may develop and cause you to get demotivated, have low self-esteem, and also feel hatred for a period of time. You do not want to express these feelings in public, do you?

Language seems to be a common problem for a person like you. To overcome this, you would have to bear with the fact that your own origins are...well...different from other people of the same race. Learn to listen to conversations carefully, pick up words that are easy to hear/say, remember the meanings and try to apply them in daily conversations. A simple one will do, it doesn't have to be a complicated and long sentence. And remember to converse with a person who really knows what you are trying to say so that s/he can correct your mistakes. Of course, dont go talk in chinese with a stranger, later s/he will look at you with one kind of expression, your face also gone!

Although i've always been around chinese educated people, sometimes it just feels awkward when all of them converse in chinese while i'm the only one being quiet throughout the duration. Sigh, yes, I'm used to it...but I'm still human leh, I will get annoyed wan leh...What's worse is when people start making fun of me...in chinese!!! FUUUUUU!!! Personally, i feel that reading from a chinese guide book is not as effective as speaking and listening to the language itself. Every once in a while when i catch a word which is commonly used, i would ask if it means that something in english. So if it matches, then it would be quite easy for me to relate to cantonese as well.

No Need Title lah...

Eric, although you have worked out a plan at least 1 week in advance, the outcome didnt turn out as expected. Do you know why? The reason is because you lack of STRATEGIC planning. You paved the path to your destination, but you didnt consider the various variables that might deviate you from achieving your goal.

For instance, you had planned to go for a movie with a group of friends. You set your plans, but the fact is that many things can alter the outcome of the plan such as say...heavy rain causing massive jam, or car breaking down on the road, or getting lost, stopped by a policeman, etc. Worse case scenario would be that ALL of them eventually ffk.

A good project manager would have considered these circumstances and try to prevent/avoid them with additional backup plans. Some might arguably say being flexible is a good attribute one must have, it is still not good enough. Being flexible in this context means that the person is prepared for whatever outcome is thrown at them, and spontaneously act according to the event.

A good planning is often the better solution to ensure that the goals are met.

Another thing I wish to highlight (especially to myself) is to go for whatever you wanna do. If you wanna go ice skating, go ahead. If you wanna go paintballing, go ahead, no one's stopping you. Budget is not an issue in these cases as you am already working. If you do not do what you want to do now, it might not be freely available to you in future. Treat every day or moment as if it was your last (touch wood) and never regret doing it.

"Live life to the fullest" (quote someone lah)
"Time waits for no one" (quote someone again lah)

One last thing Eric, just be yourself. I know you are not a laughable person, but please stop making a fool of yourself by creating not-so-funny aka lame jokes. It only makes you feel like a complete fool/noob. That might turn off some people. If others want to be popular with their attention-seeking attitude, let them be. I'd advise you to stay cool, nothing wrong with being quiet, take it easy, relax, and converse normally without the silly laugh. You might not know who is secretly admiring you. Damn, I HAD to say it eventually...-_-

P.S: Facial looks and body physique aren't everything in a guy. So it shouldn't be an excuse to have low self-esteem.